Wednesday, January 30, 2013

posishion opens for new twinkie-applys withins

Hello folks,
it's me agains Tanktop Tammy. Sos just sittin here in my garage sittin and drinkin and starin and smokins. It be a rainins outsides so me and Creepo done haves to spents the day in da garage. The brats be at school, thank gods.
KooKoo done be releesed and sos she now startins up her daycare centers agains so my brats be goins there after schools. Causin I needs da break.
Lawnboy be hangin lots in his bathroom. Drinkin. And smokin. He sure do reek. Mostly of self pity.
He be lookin for a new twinkie. So if you bein betweens the ages of 14 and 17 do applys for the posishion. Especeely ifen you needs a computer. And donts minds bein stalked and trolled by a five foots two creepy stinky crab riddled stealins little fella.
Think I go beat someone ups. Makes me feels better.
See ya bitches,
Tanktop Tammy

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Lawnboy done gots the crabs-uhoh

Hello folks,
its me agains Tanktop Tammy. Happy New Year to all you bitches. I kicked 2012's ass to the curb. It felts good. Soon I be kickin Lawnboy to the curb too! Haha loser.

Sos that dang bastard Lawnboy done be usin my razor to done shaves off his pubes. Icky. He done gots the crabs. On his hairs. So he thoughts he could done shaves dem off. Stupid retard. Haha loser. Icky.

KooKoo done spents the new year in da looney bin. Ooops. Guesses she done goes off her meds agains. haha!

Loser daddy done takes my brats for new years eves. So me and my bestest friend forever Creepo  done celebrates togethers. We eats weenies (my favourites) and dranks beers. Lawnboy the poor pathetic bastard aint got no place to go. What? No teenage girls to partyies with. Haha loser. Maybe his Pinky Pal be done gone agains, maybe they done haves a what you calls 'lovers quarrel' either that or Lawnboy done ate Pinky Pal. There be some strange lookin meats in the freezer. Uhoh.

Better bes goins, sees all you bitches,
Tanktop Tammy

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Turned Yellow and POPPED! Haha!

Hello folks,
its me agains Tanktop Tammy.

Sos Lawnboy the Douchebag's aunty Ugly-Face done turned yellow and POPPED! Finally. That ol hag be a drunk done for years now and everyones be awaitins for her to drops dead sos they can haves her moneys. She be REAL nasty when she be alives. And always drunks too. Her skins turn ugly yellow and then she done died.

 I done goin  to her funurals with Creepo (my bestest friend forevers) sos we can eats. They be lots of foods there. Lawnboys only done went to see ifen he can gits some moneys outa her now that she be deads. He be tryins to gits moneys from hers for years.

Anyways the funurals be stranges. Causin everyone be SO happy! No one done be sad now that aunty Ugly-face be deads. Everyone be laughins and playins pins da tail on da donkeys. Mostly everyones be drunks causin there be lots o drunks in Lawnboys family.

Creepo done says that ifen ya think this funurals be a happy ones you just waits til Lawnboy the Douche done turns yellow and POPS! Haha loser. It be comin. He already is turnins into a nice shades of yellow! Keep ya fingers crossed!

On other news, KooKoo done opnes up a new daycares. She be takin her pills now so she be 'safe'. We see. And Lawnboy decided thats the brats wonts have a christmas this year causin he done spents the moneys already on hiself. Movies, dinners, lunches and new clothes fer hiself done adds up fast bitches. So that be nice the kids done give up christmas fer Lawnboy the Douche.

Merry Christmas Bitches. Joy to all and all that shit.
later losers,
Tanktop Tammy

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Happy Birthday to ME!

Hello folks,
its me agains Tanktop Tammy.

Sos losts be happenins folks. I done haves me birthdates!! I be SO awesome. Creepo (my bestest friend forevers) done buys me a tims coffee. It done tastes SO goods. Now I know whys Lawnboy the douchebag always done drinks them coffees. Instant home coffee aints good enough for the douche. For my birthdate Lawnboy done buys hiself a nice present. For hiself. On my credits cards. A beeutiful winter leathers coat. It be REAL nice. I was SO luckys that loser daddy done boughts the kids a winter coat for this year, causin they be still wearins nothin. Thank gods for loser daddy.

Sos KooKoo done be releesed from that there looney bin. She says she feels a hole lots better. And now she be readys to opens a daycares.

My brats are doins good. Ever since SuperDuper (that be my favourites one) gots hiself a Big Brother, he done stops feelins sad and bashin his head againstest the cement sidewalk. So that be a good thing. And Pigface be doins lots of stuffs with PumpkinHead and his family. So they be real busy.

Hopefullies the aliens done comes down and takes away Lawnboys for some probins.

later bitches,
Tanktop Tammy

Sunday, November 4, 2012

Not A Douchbag Fault and Halloweenies Eggs

Hello folks,
SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. Lawnboy the DoucheBag be past out. He done gots a BIG HANGOVERS. He done spents ALL nights out with his little buddy Pinky Pal. He be partyins REAL hard and donts wants nobodies to destirbs him. He done spents ALL the moneys that was supposes to be goins to the brats fer clothes. But now it be ALL gone.

Donts get mads at Lawnboy. It not be his fault. Nothins be his faults. He has what you call a diseases. Yeah, sexuals diseases but I aints talkins bouts them. No Lawnboy done what you call a al-co-ho-lics diseases. And it NOT be his faults. So it not be his faults that he done takes ALL our moneys and spends it on one nights of boozins. So whats ifen the kids aints gots no clothes. They done shopped 3 yrs agos fer clotheses. That should be fine stills. And sos whats ifen the kids go to beds hungrys. Too bad fer you done says Lawnboy Larry. It not be his fault. Aint nothin be his fault. Lawnboy just likes to party. And it done makes him REAL miserables when he done haves to partyes SO much. Causin just thinks bout it-it done cost ALOT of moneys to partyes so much. What with the costs of beers. And the costs of nice dinners. It would makes anyone angrys with havins to spends SO much moneys every days on beers. It be very expensive to be a al-co-ho-lic. And douchebag.

Sos Halloweenies done sucked. Again. I done got egged. In da face. I aints wearins no mask eithers. Me and Creepo (that be my bestest friend forever) done sits on my stoop readys to scare da craps outa dem kids when alls of a suddens, a egg done go splats in my face. Sos I licked it ups. It not be half bad.

KooKoo done ends up in da looney bins AGAINS. It not be her fault. Shes just crazy. Creepo says Lawnboy shoulds be in da looney bins too. Hahaha loser. I be SO awesome.

Anyways later bitches,
Tanktop Tammy

Saturday, October 27, 2012

Bag O Shit Lawnboy Done Wins A Award

Hello folks,
it be me agains Tanktop Tammy.

Sos Lawnboy done wons a awards. He done wons the awards for 'Beins the WORST dad EVER'. He be SO prouds of hiself. All these years of puttins hiself first and only carins bouts itself, done has paids off finally, he done be sayins. The brats be sad they aint gots no dad but as I says you cants have everythins. Anyways, Pigface be at PumpkinHeads most days now and SuperDuper (that be my favourite one) be havins fun times with his 'big brother'. His big brather talks to SuperDuper and SuperDuper done likes that alots.

Anyways we all be hopins Lawnboy Larry be dead soon. With all his drinkins, he should be turnin yellows any day now and POP! Haha loser! It be a sure dam waste of those nice new shiny shoes he done just boughts hiself.

Sos me and my bestest friend forevers be sittin and hangins. It almost be Halloweenies time. I donts need no masks again this year. My face done scares dem kids somethin awful. Ors maybe they can just looks at Lawnboy bein past outs. Lawnboy be one UGLY dude.

Anyways, gots to get backs to my stoop.
later bitches,
Tanktop Tammy

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

thanksgivins happinesses

Hello folks,
its me agains Tanktop Tammy. Sos just sittin here with my bestest friend forever Creepo. We be sittin and starin and bullyin and smokin. It be a good day.

Lawnboy Larry done be REAL busy. He done be gettin a brand NEW computer readies for his new victim, I means, crush. She be 14 and he be really likin this ONE lots! He be workins on dat computer fer her ALL day. I sure done hopes she likes it. Of coarses it done be comins with a key-loggins on it sos Lawnboys can spys. Haha losers. Lawnboy keeps REAL busy spiuns on all the teenagers. It be alot of work.

He sure do looks nice in his nice NEW outfits these days. Nice clothes but stills a BAD die jobs on his hairs. He looks like an OLD retard. Anyways, I done signs my brat SuperDuper (that be my favourite one) to gets a BIG brother. Causin SuperDuper done needs a 'father figures'. He ain't gots no dad, just Lawnboy and Lawnboy be more an angry bitter DRUNK  old teenager than anythings else. SuperDuper done REALLY likes his big brother. His big brother done takes him places and done be nice to hims. Somethins Lawnboy never be.

Pigface be at her bestest friend forevers PumpkinHeads ALL weekend! YAY for me. I needs the breaks.

Sos thanksgivins just be me and Creepos. It be a GOOD times. No Lawnboys! Yay for me agains!

later losers,
Tanktop Tammy