Hello folks,
it's me again Tanktop Tammy. Sos you asks yourselfs, what am I doin right now? Nothin. What did you expect.
Sos just sittin on my stoop smokin and drinkin, starin and scowlin as neighbours walk past. This be my favourite.
Right now Lawnboy Larry be walkin up and down, up and down the front sidewalk. Aimlessly. Sometimes he do miss a-cuttin them lawns but mostly he now likes to be pacin back and forth, back and forth.
That stupid KooKoo done be a-baby-sittin my brats. She's still on them happy pills. She done told me the doctor done put her on a higher dose. Sos she 'safe' now. She most likely won't be a-hurtin nobody now. Sos she be a-baby-sittin my brats right now. Her voice be all high pitched and sweetsie like. It kind of creeps me out BUT she is a-baby-sittin my brats sos that be good. Gives me more time for my favourite hobbies of smokin, drinkin, starin and scowlin. Gives more time for Lawnboy Larry to pace. And best of all I don't be havin to look at my ugly kids faces!
I just noticed the other day, that Pigface done not be a-growin up. She be growin all right BUT not up but just OUT. She be done gettin fat. Lawnboy Larry done says she be a-lookin ALOT like me. Cool.
My favourite kid SuperDuper be always a-runnin round naked. Lawnboy Larry and I be too lazy to put them clothes on it. Sos he's be runnin round naked. KooKoo thinks he should have clothes on. She also don't think it be a good idea that he runs out behind movin cars either. But what the hell does she know. She's plain nuts.
Creepo, my best friend forever be keepin busy playin with wood chunks. And CB be busy hangin with me. Her brats don't seem to be growin up either. They don't seem to be growin at all. Ah well, who cares.
Anyway, gotta go light up another cigarette. Now where did that Lawnboy Larry go to now. He needs to be makin me some of that there lunch. His loser daddy done bring us more groceries over earlier. And gives us another car. Lawnboy Larry done smashed up our pretty white truck. SOs now we's got a black car. It sure be pretty.
Life sure is good when you don't have to works, and losers take your kids and other losers brings you foods and cigarettes and other stuffs too. Losers!
OK gotta go, seriously, this butt is a-goin burn my fingers.
later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Thursday, August 26, 2010
More Yoga time
Hello Folks,
what's new with Tanktop Tammy you ask? Same old nothin losers. What did you expect. Seriously.
Anyway, CB and me done went to 'yoga' again. Boy we sure do likes yoga. We headed back to the same bar we's went to last time. They got a pool table and a dart board. It is cool. If you think Lawnboy Larry be findin out I be not at yoga, don't worry, Lawnboy Larry's an idiot and he'll never figure it out. Course less he done reads this here blog of mine. But he ain't that smart. And I don't even think he can read.
I leaves him at home to watch the brats. He don't watch them too good though cause he be mainly passed out in the bathroom. Ah well, them brats of ours be hardy stock. Mainly they just run around and scream anyways. KooKoo done still wants to babysit my brats and I was gonna let her too. Til I done found out she done wanted to get paid. Can you believe that. Crazy old KooKoo.
Creepo and I are a-gonna head over to the bar next week since he still be my very bestest best friend in the whole wide world. We sure do have fun sitting and starin and smokin together.
His oldest brat Little Bastard done be climbin a tree again and got shot out of it by a bee-bee gun. Hahaha loser! Sos he be all broken bones now. Too bad sucka.
I can't remember the last time Lawnboy Larry done be cuttin them lawns? Nobody done hire him out in forever. Maybe he shouldn't be called Lawnboy no more. Maybe Funny-cigarettes Larry? or Loser Larry or Passed-out Larry? Or Skateboard Larry? Tho he don't be playin on that there skateboard so much. Not since he done found them funny cigarettes.
Anyway, We be a-liken this life though. What with loser daddy be buyin us EVERYTHING! Loser. We be doin alright.
Anyway, gotta go and snap a passerbyer, she be a-lookin at me funny like. I sure am a-gonna snap her in two. That'll learn her to look at me. Or in my direction.
Later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
what's new with Tanktop Tammy you ask? Same old nothin losers. What did you expect. Seriously.
Anyway, CB and me done went to 'yoga' again. Boy we sure do likes yoga. We headed back to the same bar we's went to last time. They got a pool table and a dart board. It is cool. If you think Lawnboy Larry be findin out I be not at yoga, don't worry, Lawnboy Larry's an idiot and he'll never figure it out. Course less he done reads this here blog of mine. But he ain't that smart. And I don't even think he can read.
I leaves him at home to watch the brats. He don't watch them too good though cause he be mainly passed out in the bathroom. Ah well, them brats of ours be hardy stock. Mainly they just run around and scream anyways. KooKoo done still wants to babysit my brats and I was gonna let her too. Til I done found out she done wanted to get paid. Can you believe that. Crazy old KooKoo.
Creepo and I are a-gonna head over to the bar next week since he still be my very bestest best friend in the whole wide world. We sure do have fun sitting and starin and smokin together.
His oldest brat Little Bastard done be climbin a tree again and got shot out of it by a bee-bee gun. Hahaha loser! Sos he be all broken bones now. Too bad sucka.
I can't remember the last time Lawnboy Larry done be cuttin them lawns? Nobody done hire him out in forever. Maybe he shouldn't be called Lawnboy no more. Maybe Funny-cigarettes Larry? or Loser Larry or Passed-out Larry? Or Skateboard Larry? Tho he don't be playin on that there skateboard so much. Not since he done found them funny cigarettes.
Anyway, We be a-liken this life though. What with loser daddy be buyin us EVERYTHING! Loser. We be doin alright.
Anyway, gotta go and snap a passerbyer, she be a-lookin at me funny like. I sure am a-gonna snap her in two. That'll learn her to look at me. Or in my direction.
Later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
Monday, August 23, 2010
Yoga be Good
Hello again folks,
it's me, Tanktop Tammy. Lawnboy Larry done says that I'm getting pretty fat. Sos I done told him that I be a-goin to that there what's called Yoga. Me and CB done says we be a-goin together. But we decided to screw that there yoga and done went to a bar instead. We sat there ALL afternoon drinkin and smokin and sittin. We done played some darts and some pool. And we done listen to music. I done left Lawnboy Larry with them brats of ours. Once I woke him up from his beer induced stupor.
CB and I sure did have some fun today. We be thinkin of goin back to yoga real soon again!
Now I'm a-sittin in the dark outside smokin. Lawnboy Larry's passed out on the stairs. Brats are a-screamin. It's only 11:30 PM sos it's too early for them bedtimes.
KooKoo be peerin at me through them blinds. She keeps them shut up tight all day. Just peeks out every now and then. Her daycare don't seem to be goin so good. No ones be bringin them brats to her. Lawnboy Larry and mine's cuttin lawns business ain't be goin too good neither. Seems no one wants us to cut them there lawns. Don't know why? It's good we be on welfare. And Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy's money. He sure do likes to buys us EVERYTHING! Loser!!
Sos, gotta go, be needin another smoke.
later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
it's me, Tanktop Tammy. Lawnboy Larry done says that I'm getting pretty fat. Sos I done told him that I be a-goin to that there what's called Yoga. Me and CB done says we be a-goin together. But we decided to screw that there yoga and done went to a bar instead. We sat there ALL afternoon drinkin and smokin and sittin. We done played some darts and some pool. And we done listen to music. I done left Lawnboy Larry with them brats of ours. Once I woke him up from his beer induced stupor.
CB and I sure did have some fun today. We be thinkin of goin back to yoga real soon again!
Now I'm a-sittin in the dark outside smokin. Lawnboy Larry's passed out on the stairs. Brats are a-screamin. It's only 11:30 PM sos it's too early for them bedtimes.
KooKoo be peerin at me through them blinds. She keeps them shut up tight all day. Just peeks out every now and then. Her daycare don't seem to be goin so good. No ones be bringin them brats to her. Lawnboy Larry and mine's cuttin lawns business ain't be goin too good neither. Seems no one wants us to cut them there lawns. Don't know why? It's good we be on welfare. And Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy's money. He sure do likes to buys us EVERYTHING! Loser!!
Sos, gotta go, be needin another smoke.
later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
Monday, August 9, 2010
Catch Ups with Tanktop Tammy
Hello Folks,
it's me again Tanktop Tammy,
sos it done rains here today. Sos I sat under me new canopy. Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy done bought it for us. What a loser. Gots some new campin chairs today too. Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy done bought us them. I told him too. Besides he was already there buyin us our groceries. And smokes. And beers.
Which reminds me. Lawnboy Larry done be drinkin them beers ALL weekend. He still done passed out in the bathroom. I best be a-goin and kickin at him. Makes sure he still be alive.
Gots the beeutiful truck all done fixed up. Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy done gots it fixed for us. It smelled better too. They says they cleaned it up some. It sure does smell pertty. I done sat in it for two hours this morning. Now it smells like smokes. Pigface done joined me for a long time. She done fell asleep sos I just left her in there. Wonder if she's still in there?
Little Bastard's done finally out of that there hospital. He done says he likes that there hospital better. He says the foods done better and they done treat him a whole lot nicer. He says they at that there hospital don't even yells at him. That, I can not believe.
I oughta send Pigface there. Maybe Creepo will drown her again. In that there what he calls 'slam dunk'. He sure do likes that game.
Well, better get back to my stoop. The rain done stops.
Later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
it's me again Tanktop Tammy,
sos it done rains here today. Sos I sat under me new canopy. Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy done bought it for us. What a loser. Gots some new campin chairs today too. Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy done bought us them. I told him too. Besides he was already there buyin us our groceries. And smokes. And beers.
Which reminds me. Lawnboy Larry done be drinkin them beers ALL weekend. He still done passed out in the bathroom. I best be a-goin and kickin at him. Makes sure he still be alive.
Gots the beeutiful truck all done fixed up. Lawnboy Larry's loser daddy done gots it fixed for us. It smelled better too. They says they cleaned it up some. It sure does smell pertty. I done sat in it for two hours this morning. Now it smells like smokes. Pigface done joined me for a long time. She done fell asleep sos I just left her in there. Wonder if she's still in there?
Little Bastard's done finally out of that there hospital. He done says he likes that there hospital better. He says the foods done better and they done treat him a whole lot nicer. He says they at that there hospital don't even yells at him. That, I can not believe.
I oughta send Pigface there. Maybe Creepo will drown her again. In that there what he calls 'slam dunk'. He sure do likes that game.
Well, better get back to my stoop. The rain done stops.
Later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
Monday, August 2, 2010
Long Weekend Blues
Hello folks,
it's me again, Tanktop Tammy.
Sos, this be the long weekend. I be a-sittin on my back stoop. Just starin and sittin and smokin and scowlin. Lawnboy Larry be a-moanin and a-groanin. It's cause he done got beats up by KooKoo. Last thursday she done caught him stealin her happy pills, sos she punched him in the groin. He still be a-moanin and a-groanin.
Little Bastard's still in that there hospital. They done a-goin keep him for whats called observation.
Creepo done be real sad causin the Tim Hortons down the block done gots closed up. Creepo be a-missin his coffee. He done look sad. He don't even wants to move his there chunks of wood round no more.
On saturday, new people that just moved in, just moved out. AND they done stole our campin chairs. We didn't do nothin to them. Just some bullyin and some intimidationin and some funny tricks. Like Lawnboy Larry done loves to play his old trick of ringin them doorbells and then a-runnin away. That be his favourite. We also done like to slit their tires, throw balls at their heads and have our brats play in THEIR backyards. Don't know whys they done moved out? Or why they done took our campin chairs. When I finds them, I be a-snappin them in two!
Last week, my beeutiful truck that loser daddy done gives us is all fulls of water. Lawnboy Larry done be playin with the window button that done makes the window goes up and down, up and down, and he done broke it. Then it rained. Now my beeutiful truck be done wet. Sos we called loser daddy to come and get the truck and fix it for us.
Sos I just be a-sittin and starin and smokin and scowlin. And growlin.
Later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
it's me again, Tanktop Tammy.
Sos, this be the long weekend. I be a-sittin on my back stoop. Just starin and sittin and smokin and scowlin. Lawnboy Larry be a-moanin and a-groanin. It's cause he done got beats up by KooKoo. Last thursday she done caught him stealin her happy pills, sos she punched him in the groin. He still be a-moanin and a-groanin.
Little Bastard's still in that there hospital. They done a-goin keep him for whats called observation.
Creepo done be real sad causin the Tim Hortons down the block done gots closed up. Creepo be a-missin his coffee. He done look sad. He don't even wants to move his there chunks of wood round no more.
On saturday, new people that just moved in, just moved out. AND they done stole our campin chairs. We didn't do nothin to them. Just some bullyin and some intimidationin and some funny tricks. Like Lawnboy Larry done loves to play his old trick of ringin them doorbells and then a-runnin away. That be his favourite. We also done like to slit their tires, throw balls at their heads and have our brats play in THEIR backyards. Don't know whys they done moved out? Or why they done took our campin chairs. When I finds them, I be a-snappin them in two!
Last week, my beeutiful truck that loser daddy done gives us is all fulls of water. Lawnboy Larry done be playin with the window button that done makes the window goes up and down, up and down, and he done broke it. Then it rained. Now my beeutiful truck be done wet. Sos we called loser daddy to come and get the truck and fix it for us.
Sos I just be a-sittin and starin and smokin and scowlin. And growlin.
Later losers,
Tanktop Tammy
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